The anticipation
and anxiety caused by no information is unreal.
The only thing I can compare it to is that split second when you take
your eyes off your kids, and then you can’t find them for a moment. It’s not quite panic yet, because you know
they couldn’t have gone far, but you just need to lay your eyes on them. Or, it’s like when you’re waiting to find out
those test results. Good or bad, you
just need to know so you can deal with it.
Or, when you’re trying to get pregnant, but it’s too early to take the
test. The days can’t go by fast
enough. You just want to know so you can
deal with it, good or bad. Well, the
anxiety has been killing me lately, but once again, God has stepped up and
taken over in His perfect timing. God
has promised me that there is NOTHING that He and I can’t handle together, and
I trust those words more now than ever before.
It’s Adoption
Awareness Month. I thought we had dodged
a bullet at church when it wasn’t mentioned last Sunday. Selfishly, I prayed that we would not have to
endure any of those heart wrenching videos with picture after picture of dirty,
hungry orphans waiting to be adopted. I
envisioned myself becoming emotional, like usual, but this time the entire
church would be looking at me because they know that we are in the
process. I’m on edge anyway, and
something like that could easily push me over. I felt
safe once again this morning when we began to recognize our veterans. I figured we probably wouldn’t take the time
to honor veterans and show an orphan video.
Then it happened. I heard the
words, “Adoption Awareness Month”, and my heart sank. I thought, “I can’t watch this video. How am I going to get out of here?” Bro. Mark started talking about adoption and
his family, and he recognized all the families in our church that have been
touched by adoption. Then, he reminded
us that we have all been adopted into God’s family. By this time, I was flooded with emotion as I
waited for that video. Then, Bro. Mark asked
us to come down front. Seriously, my
only thought was, that’s better than a video.
I cannot express in words what it felt like to have Godly people lay
their hands on us and pray at the altar specifically for our family. I felt God’s presence in a way that I never
thought possible. The moment the prayer
ended, and we stood up, it felt like ten thousand pounds were lifted off of my
chest. All of the anxiety and anticipation vanished, and the relief was
unexplainable. I’m even ready for that
video now. Amazing.
Even in the
wait, when everything else is still, God continues to reveal Himself in His
perfect timing. God never said it would
be easy, He just said it would be worth it.
Thank you my Lord for allowing me the opportunity to see your purpose so
clearly. Had I not been so overwhelmed,
I could not have experienced your power to make things so clear and perfect again. How awesome is HE!
